If juggling a full-time job and parenthood sounds daunting; managing a business while caring of a newborn is even more challenging. But as first-time parents and business owners Linda and Darius prove, with the right priorities, you can balance both family and career goals.
Both in their 30s, Darius Chua and his wife Linda recently became parents to a baby boy. Darius owns a communications agency with more than 30 staff in Singapore and Kuala Lumpur, while Linda runs a health and fitness company focused on pre-post natal woman, baby, and toddler exercises.
With two busy businesses to run, how does Darius and Linda cope with their demands of work and still find time to bond with their son Jacob? For one, being business owners means they have more control over their work schedule.
“The good thing about being a business owner is flexibility about your own time. Having a baby means putting the baby as a top priority especially during the initial few months. That’s why Linda resolved to lower her number of commitments in preparation for pre and post pregnancy,” explained Darius.
Added Linda, “My flexible work hours also mean I have better control on the amount of maternity leave needed. I plan to go back to work after two months of rest but I’ll likely scale down my commitments to care for Jacob.”
For Linda, motherhood has proved to be a rewarding experience in more ways than one.
“It is a priceless experience and I will never trade it for anything else. Has it changed me? In many ways, yes. I am quite a workaholic and with my Jacob’s arrival, I have had to re-prioritise quite a fair bit,” she noted.
“Since my company focuses on preggies and babies, I have to say the experience has made me realise the actual issues of what my students have been facing and to show more empathy. I am also excited since I will have a real life baby here for me to use as a “model” for my baby classes!”
While some dads prefer to fully immerse themselves in caring for the newborn, Darius confessed that he is the “semi hands-on daddy” who isn’t too keen on the “dirty” jobs.
“I’ve gone through the courses, read books and done a couple of practicals before Jacob arrived. But I prefer to leave the less desirable matters such as diaper changing to Linda and helper,” he admitted.
“I like to carry and talk to Jacob before I go off to work and after I’ve cleaned up when I return from work. Hence I spend a lot of time talking to him, singing children’s songs and even making up my own tunes. I’ve even learned to recognise what tunes and tones he likes and which position he prefers to be in at different times. I also do the bottle feeds and burp him; after which I will play with him or coax him to sleep depending on his mood.”
Even though caring for Jacob takes up the bulk of their time after work, Darius and Linda make an effort to spend quality couple time together.
“We still make it a point to share couch time – our form of couple time where we sit side by side on the couch to reflect and share. This can happen when we are just relaxing after dinner or when Linda needs to breastfeed Jacob - as long as it allows us to pay full attention to each other,” shared Darius.
The couple is also thankful for the help from their parents and siblings, who visit them every week to help look after Jacob; giving them some extra time for themselves and each other.
Although they were initially against hiring a helper, Darius and Linda took a leap of faith when a church friend had a helper available for transfer. As it turned out, even though the helper did not have experience looking after infants, she has been great help around the house, taking care of the housework.
For parents-to-be who are concerned about how to care for their newborn during the initial months , Darius and Linda recommend that couples consider engaging the service of a confinement nanny.
“To be honest, our experience with the nanny wasn’t that good, although she did alleviate a lot of the baby caring effort. She had a poor work attitude and wasn’t pro-breast feeding. Despite this, we still feel that a confinement nanny is crucial for new parents to make the transition into parenthood a smoother experience,” said Darius.
The sports-loving couple plan to get back into their favourite sports as soon as they “get the hang of Jacob’s routine”. Darius hopes to return to biking, while Linda is looking forward to coaching fellow mums and mums-to-be in Pilates when she returns to work.
“Although we have lesser couple time now, I am sure it will get better once Jacob’s sleep pattern and food clock stabilises. We are both active people so we will definitely inject all those sports into our parenting life,” noted Linda.
Perhaps the greatest joy of being parents can be summed up by Darius’ observation about having a child of your own.
“The best thing about being a parent, is to look at him and marvel at such a wonderful creation; to know that he is a part of you and embodies the love of a husband and wife. Nothing chases away the weariness of a stressful day than the sight of your smiling child welcoming you home.”
